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May 17 - Read 1 Chronicles 27 - 29

5/17/2016

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READ 1 CHRONICLES 27 - 29 HERE
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Who did God choose to build the temple?

Who became priest when Solomon became king?

How many years did David reign?

Lesson: Although David had sinned, he sought God with all his heart and God not only forgave him, but used him in a great and powerful way. Even as we labor
in whatever season of life we are in, let us seek to be used of God.

Prayer: Father, help me to seek you with a true heart, a whole heart and a sincere heart (and maybe with the heart of a child). Amen.








   


​          THE LIGHTER SIDE OF THEOLOGY (as explained by children)


The first book of the Bible is Guinessis, in which Adam & Eve were created from an apple tree.

Noah’s wife was called Joan of Ark.

Lot’s wife was a pillar of salt by day and a ball of fire by night.

Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.

Unleavened bread is bread made without ingredients.

Moses went to the top of Mt. Cyanide to get the 10 commandments.

The 7th commandment is ‘Thou shalt not admit adultery.’

Joshua let the Hebrew in the battle of Geritol.

David fought the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical  times.

Solomon had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.

Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.

The people who followed Jesus were called the 13 decibels.

The Epistles were the wives of the Apostles.

One of the opossums was St. Matthew.

Paul preached holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage.

A Godly person should have only one wife. This is called monotony.

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